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Images of Leadership: Sage

by Rich Lamb

 
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This Leading Edge (R) training session focuses on a model of influence through good question asking rather than advice-giving or manipulative influence. Solomon (1 Kings 3) is used as a model.

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Images of Leadership: Sage Leadership Skills for Effective Ministry Leader’s Notes Draft 11/25/2001

Overview
I recently went to a John Maxwell seminar entitled “The 21 Irrefutable Laws
of Leadership.” While some of the material and ideas were helpful, it left
me feeling flat. The nature of laws is they seem so black and white—they
are, after all, irrefutable laws. Yet leadership—certainly exhibiting it,
even teaching it—doesn’t seem so black and white. The advantage of
thinking about images, biblical, three-dimensional, look-at-them-from-
different-angles images is that they are not black and white. They have
texture and shape, they can be examined at a distance or in detail. And, in
fact, they are biblical. Most often, images are the ways the scripture
teaches about leadership. In one form, parables, they comprise the bulk of
Jesus’ teaching in the gospels.

Hence Images of Leadership. The nine images are meant to form a
package, a composite image, of leadership from scripture. One of the
strengths of the multiple images is that for various teachers, different
images will stand out as helpful and central, while other images may be
more unfamiliar. But the composite of images helps to avoid the danger of
over-generalizing. In other words, it is easy for a shepherding leader to
teach on leadership as if it is all about shepherding, while a visionary
leader may tend to teach on leadership as if vision is the only key
quality. So taking a broader survey of some of the biblical images and
depictions of leadership can broaden what might otherwise be a narrow diet
of teaching. Each image, each chapter of the material, can easily stand alone and
doesn’t need the other material to make it understandable or useable for a
group. So a staff person working with a group may decide that the first
thing the leaders need is a teaching on the leader as sage, for example.
However, there is some logic or structure in the ordering of the chapters,
as I will outline below. I have taught the material over two days with
staff, and I have taught 3 or 4 sessions in a one-day seminar with leaders
in a church setting. My ideal schedule would be Friday night, all day
Saturday, two sessions, about 6 months apart. I would try to cover sessions
1-5 during the first weekend, and sessions 6-9 during the second. But of
course the advantage of the sessions being modular is that they can be
rearranged to serve the needs of the group or team.

Chapter Content and Flow
. Chapters 1, 2, and 3 form the introductory core material. When I have

taught this material on campus, I am eager to teach this early in the year. . In fact, I have tended to use the servant material (chapter 2) during the spring of the year as an intro seminar for all students interested in leadership for the following fall. I take 2 to 2.5 hours to go through the whole seminar: an hour on the scripture studies, followed by shorter presentation of the material in the notes, followed by small group discussion of a campus-oriented case study (see the leader’s notes for an example—the one in the printed material is more oriented toward a church). . The Shepherding material (chapter 1) can be taught over the course of three weeks for on-campus leadership training of small group leaders and other influence leaders in a chapter. Don’t rush the scripture study. . The Patient material (chapter 3) can also be taught in the Spring, as people are deciding to be leaders, or else during the fall, as the initial excitement about being in leadership is giving way to a job- description approach. In this way, people need to be reminded of how God is healing/developing them and their character through the experience of leadership.
. Chapters 4 and 5 address influence dynamics. The sage image (chapter 4) addresses the situation you have when people trust you and are asking (in one way or another) for your advice. The sentinel image (chapter 5) addresses the situation when the people you are seeking to influence or lead aren’t coming to you looking for advice. They may need challenge or exhortation, but for whatever reason they aren’t initially seeking such influence. It is helpful to make a distinction between these two postures, and to recognize that a full leadership role includes the ability to lead through gentle questions and good listening at times, but also the ability to challenge and “exhort one another every day” as is sometimes necessary.
. Chapters 6-9 form a body of material I tend not to use with new leaders, but rather with leaders of leaders. Or another way to put it: chapters 1-5 addresses the leadership of groups, while chapters 6-9 speaks towards the leadership of teams. On campus, this means I would use this material with a new exec team, or other student leaders of teams of leaders (outreach team, worship team, drama team, publicity team, mission team, etc). New small group leaders may not really need the vision stuff, but the people leading small group leaders do. If you are doing staff training with this material, I would expect most staff are in the place where this material will be extremely helpful. But younger students don’t need this latter material—focus your training of them on the dynamics of shepherding, servanthood, and influence. . Chapter 6 speaks of vision. A crucial concept for anyone who would lead any team trying to accomplish anything but the most rudimentary of tasks. . Chapters 7 (Steward) and 8 (Sponsor) could also be renamed The Leader as Manager and The Leader as Coach, respectively, though steward and sponsor are more directly biblical concepts. But these chapters deal with crucial questions of management, planning, and delegation (chapter 7) and training and empowerment (chapter 8). . Chapter 9 (Sower) speaks to the topic of multiplication. The scripture study on multiplicative ministry followed by the session on Leadership Development is built on much of the previous material, especially the Leader as Patient. It presents a powerful argument for the basis of on- the-job leadership training (campus based during the school year versus relying solely on summer leadership training at chapter camp). I almost never use this stuff with student leaders, but it would be crucial for staff, and would be very helpful for many churches.

More detailed leaders commentary.
Following these introductory remarks are leaders’ notes on each session.
These take the form of points that I have put on my manuscript or said in
discussion, without much editing or prioritizing. What immediately follows
is a summary of teaching strategies and teaching points for each of the
nine sections. This will give you a sense of how the session is organized—how 90-150 minutes is spent on each session.

Chapter 4: The Leader as Sage
This is one of the most fun sessions in the course because it is so
practical. The study on Solomon and asking for wisdom can take as much time
as you want, but there are just a few key points (see leaders notes page
33). After the study, a 20-30 minute lecture introduces the main elements
of the influence strategy being promoted: asking good questions rather than
giving advice. The case studies (page 6) illustrate the natural tendency
toward either advice giving or using bad, manipulative questions. They also
point to a better way, which is then discussed in more detail with the
Objectives-Actions-Risks method. I usually read down through a single case
study as an example, but leave the remainder for people to look at later.
The role play afterward is not really a role-play at all; people are
talking about real situations in which they face making real decisions. One
person refrains from advice or bad questions of any kind and just tries to
listen well and keep asking questions. Usually, after even just 10 minutes,
people have been helped significantly and begin to experience the power of
good listening and the great privilege it is to be listened to well.

One of the perennial issues with this study is what to do with people
who are asking for advice: yet it is better to help people think it through
than just to give them the answer, even when they are asking. Another
question comes up: how to be open and inductive when the issue seems moral,
biblical, cut-and-dried. While it is possible to be clear about what
scripture says, people must still decide if they will readily submit to
scripture, and again that is where a slow, open-ended, question-asking
strategy will serve the person well, though a leader may quickly get
impatient. Yet the goal of the conversation is conviction, not behavior
conformity, and that people know what is right, not just that they know
what we think is right. It is crucial to help staff and leaders imagine
themselves being able to ask questions in situations that they previously
would just have launched forth with answers or advice.

Scripture Study Notes:
The Leader as Sage:
Let’s talk about what you noticed in the passage.

. Solomon’s request was a wise one. It was wise to know that he needed wisdom. . He is the guy we were talking about before, the Psalm 50 guy who is in over his head-he’s in trouble, he’s asking God to get him out. He’s right where God wants him. . He’s panicked. He has just replaced his father David, the paradigmatic king of all time. The Messiah is described as the Son of David. Solomon is not the oldest heir of David-he’s got others who would desire the throne. . He’s not six years old (“I don’t know how to go out or come in”)-he’s possibly about 20. What was David like when he was Solomon’s age? Had shepherded flocks, killed lions and bears, killed Goliath, “Saul has killed his thousands; David his ten thousands,” led an army of mighty men. He was a poet, a songwriter/singer. He was the dreamboat and the man’s man all wrapped up into one. It would be intimidating to replace a guy as successful as David. . Where did Solomon grow up? In the palace, not in caves, fields, battles.

What does Solomon know about God? God is his daddy’s God.
God comes to him, “Ask whatever you want.” Psalm 2, the coronation Psalm,
read over the kings of Israel as they are anointed king. “You are my son,
today I have begotten you.” God is offering adoption to Solomon-”You aren’t
my grandson-today I have adopted you, chosen you.”

Solomon looks at the people-he sees himself small and the people great. A
picture of humility in the midst of leadership. He sees greatness in right
proportion: he is a means to the ends of this great people, rather than
that they are a means to his ends.

What did you notice about what God offers Solomon? Remind anyone of
anything? Riches = security, honor = greatness, and, if you obey me, long
life. The three motivations from the paradox promises of Mark. God says,
“Because you are asking for resources with which to care for the people you
have been given charge of, I’ll give you what you didn’t ask for but I know
you’ve been created to want: life, security, greatness.”

Solomon wakes up from a dream. What does he do? Would you throw a party for
your friends in this way? “What are we celebrating?” “Well, I had a dream
last night, and I got wisdom?” I don’t know, but I think I’d want to wait a
little while, check it out, wow the crowd before I went public announcing
that I got given wisdom by God in a dream.

Let’s talk about these two women. What did you notice about this famous
story that you had never seen before? These women are prostitutes. How many
never knew they were prostitutes? I was thinking about why that is. If you
grew up in the church, you heard about this story when you were a child,
but they just don’t have flannel graph prostitute characters, so we first
hear about this story as a story of two women, not two prostitutes. The
fact that they are prostitutes makes this story even more remarkable. These
women are the lowest class in society-beyond women, that they are
prostitutes. It is extraordinary that two prostitutes have access to the
king.

Finally, after listening to them bicker back and forth, he says, “Bring me
a sword.” Suppose you are the person whose job it is to move the palm frond
back and forth, to keep the air circulating. You are just there, and you
get to hear the whole interaction. What would you think when you hear
Solomon say, “Bring me a sword!”? They’re going to die. These two women are
going to die. Put the baby in the harem. Solomon’s been under a lot of
stress, new job, etc.

Then you hear him say, “Divide the living boy in two.” Now what do you
think? He’s a tyrant. The boy is the only one in the room who we know is
innocent. He’s crazy. “Solomon, don’t you know that if you cut the boy in
two, neither half will be any good anymore?” This is no longer excusable
stress; this is inexcusable tyrrany.

Let’s just think about it from Solomon’s perspective for a minute. What
would happen to Solomon, new king, if he threatens the sword and then
doesn’t carry out his threat? What does Solomon risk by taking this
strategy? His threats would be cheapened. His enemies would be emboldened.
It could be the beginning of the end for him.

Is this a risk for Solomon? Or would it have to have gone this way? It
makes sense at the end, when it goes the way it did, everyone knows who is
the mother. But as he was saying it, did he know what would happen? Was he
playing the odds? Everyone in the room could have said, “Don’t kill that
baby.”

When he says, “Divide the living boy in two” it is a risk of faith for him.
We don’t know how the wisdom of God was given to him-it could have been in
a dream, but one way or another (perhaps a small voice), he must walk into
that wisdom by faith. It still felt like a risk, it still felt uncertain,
and was only vindicated at the end, when it was seen to be the wisdom of
God.

This is the way God’s wisdom feels for us. Seldom is it given to us in
sealed, validated envelopes containing letters with precise guidance that
we know were dictated from God himself. God’s wisdom comes to us in
intuitions that are just half a step above a pure guess-and hence it
requires faith to step into and believe that God is at work, in part
through our acting on the wisdom we have received.

The point is, half-way through this little scene, everyone in the room had
to think he was crazy. He couldn’t wink and give clues to people that he
was just kidding.

The story travels and gets out. The fact that it involved two prostitutes
only helped to get the story traveling faster.

Let’s talk briefly about what the James passage adds to our understanding
of this story.
Solomon asked God for wisdom, without doubting that God would give it
(hence his party). He understood that God would not withhold his resources

There is a pious way of praying, “Lord if it be your will.” But we don’t
have to pray this way about wisdom, especially when we are deep over our
head in trying to car for other people. We know God wants us to care for
people and to ask him for the resources to do this better. We can ask for
wisdom without wondering if it is his will that we receive it.

Without the James passage, the story about Solomon is just a story about
Solomon. James tells us that the same offer God made to Solomon he makes to
each of us.


[After the listening exercise in pairs.]
What was it like, first of all from those who were asking the questions?
“Very difficult”
It makes you listen well, to try to ask questions that will help them, not
simply address interests you have.
How do you know if people aren’t ready for your help, or are resistant?
Jesus says “Don’t throw your pearls before swine” and “For those with ears
to hear, let them hear.” One way to tell whether they are ready to receive
more of what you have to offer is by asking good questions. IF they are
ready to listen to you, you’ll be able to discern openness through the way
they respond to your questions. If they are not ready, then you won’t be
tempted to disclose more than they are ready to hear. This strategy enables
you to figure out how open the person is to going deeper.

“Sometimes it is easier to ask these open-ended questions to people you
don’t know well.” Yes, and my wife sometimes says to me, “Look, you teach
this stuff..” The reality is that when I am on as a staffworker, I use
these insights, but with people closest to me, I can be short, rude, slam
them, fail to listen well to them. But most of all I’d want to offer this
kind of friendship to people I love the most.

What would it be like if we offered this more often, with the people around
us, listening well, asking good questions, not just offering advice or
manipulating them through our guilt-inducing questions and strategies?

What about those of you who were asked the questions? What did it feel
like? Were any of you helped, in the few minutes you had?
Someone asked me, “How do you remember how to ask good questions vs. bad
questions?” Well, one way is just to really believe that the person you are
talking to really is the expert on their own life. Then, the questions you
actually have will be good questions. If you deep down believe that you are
the expert on their life, then you will be tempted to ask leading,
manipulative, lawyerly questions because you will be trying to get them to
admit to you what you think is true. A strategy of asking good questions,
when you fundamentally are trying to prove your point, will ultimately ring
hollow. If we honor who people are, how they have been created, then we
will have good questions.

This training is not just good listening skills, but it is how to love
people better and honor them more.

You knew that this was just a little 10-minute exercise, and yet it was
helpful. What would it be like if this kind of listening care was typical
of our relationships, our small groups? What if we were loving each other
well, with the wisdom of God were flowing to one another through our
conversations with one another? Would you like to have these kinds of
relationships? Would you like to offer this to others?

The Leader as Sage (leader’s notes)
Solomon as an wise influence leader: When we are influence leaders:
Solomon depended on God for wisdom. When we consider entering into
people’s lives to influence them, we
begin with prayer for them and for
ourselves, that God would grant us
wisdom. We don’t need to pray, “If
it be your will, O Lord, grant us
wisdom.” He delights to give wisdom
to us.
Solomon highly valued and respected Our goal is not simply that people
those he leads. DO what we want them to DO, but
rather that they make fully-owned
choices that draw them closer to
God. Even as we endeavor to
influence people we honor and
respect them.
Solomon viewed himself as a means to We are careful not to manipulate
help people toward their ends rather people to choose something because
than vice versa. that choice will serve or benefit us
in some way.
Solomon was willing to be Our goal is not simply that we tell
misunderstood along the way. people the correct choice to make or
path to take, but that people come
to see how God is working and what
he is saying. We’ll sacrifice quick
clarity for eventual ownership.
Solomon acted in such a way as to Our strategy of influence is not
get to motives directed toward others’ behavior,
but towards their convictions and
priorities.
Solomon honors God and gives him When we have received wisdom from
thanks for the wisdom he has God, we must acknowledge him as the
received. source and thank him.

Caveat: Interacting with people about their decisions is not the only way
we have influence on their lives, nor is it the only way we serve or relate
to them. Modeling, scripture study, trust building, servanthood, quantity
time, etc. But influence and persuasion is a crucial component, and not an
easy one, to growth and a servant leadership lifestyle.

The Goal
Helping people reflect the teachings of Jesus and faith in God in their
convictions and priorities, and to reflect their convictions and priorities
in their actions and decisions.
. classes, major
. jobs: summer, school year, post-college
. missions trip, summer opportunities
. Chapter Camp, involvement in the group next year
. extra-curricular activities
. church involvement: where, how much
. money: missions giving, generosity
. time in other ministries: social action, church, etc.
. relationships: romantic, friendships, partnerships

Influence as persuasion (Em Griffin, Getting Together, IVP, 1982)
Meta-level dynamics of influence, describing the nature of the influence
relationship. All of these are Biblical means of influence.

. compliance: extrinsic rewards or punishments. Parents are looking for compliance. “Or I will spank you” is enough for a 2 or 3 year old. For leaders, occasionally a threat- “Repent or leave leadership.” We use compliance when we are asking leaders to make certain commitments that they seem not to be able to keep. (Don’t date frosh, come to Chapter Camp, etc.) . identification: persuader viewed as attractive. Paul says “follow me as I follow Christ” and “be imitators of me.” Also a valid means of learning. Getting someone to go to a conference because we are going, because other friends are going. We rely on this for conference recruitment-some folks end up going simply because their friends are going. They aren’t expecting their lives to be changed, but that happens anyway. . internalization: influence based on shared convictions. The goal. We want people eventually to come to a conference because of the shared values of community, scripture study, relationship with God, preparation for ministry, etc.

Verbal Tools of Influence
. Stories
. Questions
. Statements
. Advice
. Commands
[pic]

What tends to be used most often? Advice
I. Influence strategies focused on behavior (left side of the grid) have

the advantage of being clear: the actions desired may be quickly spelled out. At times this is very appropriate, as when dealing with urgent situations that can be explained or understood more fully later. Yet these tools, most obviously advice and commands, often stop far short of internalization—at best people comply with the advice or suggestions for their actions, without a deep understanding of the reasons why. This means that in the future similar decisions may be as muddled or unclear as the last time.
. Influence strategies focused on the expertise of the influencer (the bottom half of the grid) may deal with both priorities as well as actions, but leave the person being influenced open to feeling manipulated (bad questions), controlled (advice, commands), or judged (judgments).
. Influence strategies involving open conversation focused on priorities and goals (top right quadrant) involve a greater investment of time and listening effort, but the payoff is found when the person being listened to comes to their own clarity about what appropriate choice would best fulfill their priorities and objectives. They are much less likely to feel manipulated or resentful, but rather grateful for the skill and attention of the listener. In general, many people do not know how to ask good questions. Many people prefer to talk than to listen, and the fact is good listeners are exceedingly rare. (People will even pay high hourly prices to be listened to well.) Furthermore, when people think about influence, in general it takes the form of advice: “What I think you should do is .” Advice may be appropriate in some situations, but it undoubtedly is far overused. Unfortunately, because of its low-ownership nature, it is also probably undervalued. I want to identify four tools for influence, each with advantages and disadvantages: questions, statements, advice, and commands. As we have seen, questions cause people to think; they provoke insight. Asking questions allows people to understand that the solution to their problems is not wrapped up or obvious. As people answer questions they grow in ownership of the conclusions they themselves reach. Asking questions requires the least amount of authority on the part of the questioner, but when successful at making change produces the greatest degree of ownership on the part of the young disciple. Of course, one main reason you ask questions is that you don’t know what they should do. You don’t usually know the answer to their question/situation/problem initially. Even if you wanted to give advice, you need more data. Question asking is not simply an “inductive” Bible study leading your friend to your predetermined conclusion. Of course, not all influence can happen through asking of questions. Sometimes the people you are trying to influence lack the necessary data or insight to make good decisions or draw correct conclusions. At that point, one tool you have is to make direct statements or observations. A statement allows the other person to come to agreement with you, and then implies action or a change of one type or another. A statement requires slightly more authority than a question, as your friend now must evaluate the truth or helpfulness of your statement. This still allows for ownership of the conclusions drawn, if the friend considers the statement valid. Of course, based on a single statement perhaps more than one set of conclusions could be drawn. The third tool, and most familiar, is advice. Giving advice at least yields clarity, as there is no doubt about the course of action or conclusions preferred when it is spelled out in the form of “I think you should do this .” However, for advice to be received requires the advisor to have a great deal of authority, due to wisdom and experience, and demonstrated care for the individual. Advice may often backfire because the receiver lacks the chance to come to full ownership or agreement before the final conclusion is spelled out. The command is also a tool for influence, though a dangerous one. There is one way in which we can use it, in the form of the Biblical imperative. When we speak with the authority of scripture and are trusted as a friend, the command can be effective, especially where there is immediate danger to people we are caring for. However, the chance for ownership and inner conviction stemming from an issued command is low. Its use should be rare. Finally, when a story can be helpful:
. When you don’t know where people are in their faith/responsiveness to God.
. When you are uncertain about how much authority you have in people’s lives. Early on in your experience with a group or individual.
. When you are with a group of people at varying readiness to receive from you. A group of a few guys listening to you tell about your own romantic history or struggles, etc. A parabolic display-those who are on the inside will take more interest and get more explanation. Especially on areas of sexuality and sexual sin-the ability to be vulnerable in front of a larger group will open up opportunities for one-to-one interaction where the stage will already have been set, and those who have ears to hear will be eager for more direct influence on your part. Look at the case studies, page 7: [pick one for examination]. With the first issue, the person is thinking about dropping a ministry commitment. This person’s hopes for their time with you is that you would approve of their decision to drop a commitment that they have made. Of course, they know you will not be happy. How you respond to them at this point is crucial. At the outset, you have some concerns. If they asked for your advice, or even if they didn’t, you’d be tempted simply to say, “Don’t drop your ministry commitment! Stop working so much on weekends! That’s the real problem!” But shouting at them with simple and unwelcome advice is not likely to produce the desired effect: that they reflect their own Godly priorities in their choices. So we go ahead and acknowledge we begin the conversation with some pre- set ideas on what the person should do, but we don’t give advice, so we refrain from saying it. We decide we want to ask questions. However, the kinds of questions that occur to us to ask are the manipulative, guilt- inducing, non-open-ended questions like “How do you think the children (small group members, youth, etc.) will feel?” Acknowledging we want to ask these kinds of questions, we instead think about good questions that will really help the process: open-ended, not inducing guilt, not implying a course of action, helping the person to think through their own choices in terms of their own values. This then defines a different goal of your conversation: not simply to get them to do what you want them to do, but to help them make a good decision, pursuing good priorities, for the right reasons. Good Question Asking Leadership involves two-way communication. In talking with people, the way we use words is critical. We can encourage or discourage people, open them up or close them to us; we can motivate and inspire or dampen enthusiasm and engender doubts. This is true whether the context is evangelism, discipling, leading a Bible study, training a Bible study leader, or inviting someone to a conference. We want to learn to ask questions that will involve people in the process. If we only ask Yes/No questions, then our ability to dig deeper is limited by our own familiarity with the situation or the person. Consider a decision-making discussion with someone younger. Our goal as leaders, is to bring the best information to bear on any decision, so that the person making the decision can do so with ownership and confidence. We can get pumped up to ask people questions and then get trapped in a form of questioning that produces defensiveness on the part of the responder, simply because we ask questions of them the way a lawyer asks questions while cross-examining a witness. Lawyers, with a witness on the stand, know they are never to ask a question to which they don’t know the answer. The point, in a cross-examination, is not to discover the truth, but to highlight the points of information that make the truth sound like what the lawyer wants it to sound like. That is, in fact, the lawyer’s job. But that is not our job, when we are trying to listen well to our students and friends. So we need a different approach, one that doesn’t make people defensive (for they have nothing to defend), one that makes them the expert, the one with the real information regarding the best way to make the decision. So we ask questions of the following type:
Bad Questions Good Questions
Y/N: Could, would, What, where, when, who,
should, do, did, will, how
can
Closed-ended Open-ended
General Directed toward specific
categories of information
Content-oriented Process-oriented
Leading Stimulates thinking
Threatening Non-threatening
Why are you .? What are the reasons you
are.?
How to move through a decision: OAR Objectives: Goals, priorities, motives, whys, ends . What are the reasons you are doing this? . What are your motives behind this action? . What goals do you have for your (summer, time at home, semester, etc.)? . What results are you looking for? . What is the end toward which we are working? . These things need to be stated, they are often implicit. Actions: Choices, options, means, people, resources . What can you do to accomplish these objectives? . How else could you do this? . How does that action fulfill my objectives? . What are the reasons that this action is the best? If actions are attractive that don’t meet the objectives, there must be other objectives that aren’t being mentioned. Return to the discussion of objectives. Risks: costs, consequences, disadvantages . Are there hidden costs that affect reaching all the objectives? . What can go wrong with this action? . What’s the probability of that happening? . If it happens, what are the consequences? How serious are they? Most decisions are considered as actions. For example: Should I go to Chapter Camp? What classes should I take? How many hours should I work this semester? What kind of a job do I want this summer? etc. Spend more time on the objectives and the action discussion will be more fun and will go more smoothly. The leader’s contribution: to consider the objectives, help people to own Biblical objectives and priorities, and to help them make THEIR OWN DECISIONS which help them accomplish their own objectives in the best way. Role Play In Twos Role 1) Consider a real decision you are facing. Role 2) Ask questions of person 1, using OAR and good questions. Each person make remarks about the process. Rotate roles and repeat the process. After the role play:
. Debrief
. Discuss recruitment (camp, retreat, Mark study, etc.) as a specific influence situation. How, who, when, why. Recruiting Case Study and Principles

Think about and write out a bad experience of recruiting a student for some
event and then a good experience of recruiting someone. Discuss in pairs.

Many of us hate recruiting, because we hate “selling” things. We dislike
applying pressure. Yet recruiting, understood properly, is simply
leadership and influence. It is not high-pressure selling, it is
persuasion, based on shared values, and a vision that is articulated in
attractive and attainable terms. We are not selling a product no one needs:
ultimately, we are inviting people into an opportunity to meet their very
deepest needs.

Dangers:
. Thinking that getting someone to a conference or some other event will

care for them automatically. If we recruit people, and they come, we must invest in them while they are there. We must come through on our implicit or explicit promise, “I will enjoy being with you at this retreat.”
. Thinking that recruiting someone is caring for them. It is part of the process, but if the only time people see us is when we are inviting them, to a SG, LG, retreat or any other event, they will quickly conclude that we don’t actually care about them as people, just whether or not they show up to our events.
. Temptation to use manipulation: when we make promises or threats based on extrinsic reward or punishment. It is OK to say, “Come to this retreat because you will get a lot out of it.” In fact, that is why we want people to come to retreats. Getting something out of a retreat is the intrinsic reward of attending it. But it is manipulation to say, “We mostly will be choosing next year’s leaders from those who go to the retreat.” Being considered for leadership is an extrinsic reward for coming on a retreat. We don’t want people at the retreat because they have been told that that is the proper strategy for becoming a leader. Other potential intrinsic rewards: enjoy worship, enjoy making new friends, enjoy time in the community, etc. Other potential extrinsic rewards: implying its a good way to meet romantic possibilities.
. Tempted to think: if they say yes, and like us, then it was successful recruitment. We want them to say yes, but only if they want to do it. I’d rather have three people say “no” now and regret it later than one person say “yes” now and resent it later. The “no”s will come to the next retreat, and the ones after that, while the “yes” may have attended her last retreat.
. We blow trust with people when we put high status on a seemingly small event with out telling folks why we are so concerned, what the implications. We may think, “their future three years of life as a member of this fellowship all hinges on chapter camp.” However, they think, “Well, I’ll probably go next year, but what is the big deal?”
The Recruitment Process
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Before the conversation During the conversation After the conversation
Think and pray through Paint a vision: ? Follow up-talk later
each person, how they communicate with with them. Having
should be talked to, passion the larger invited them into a
how likely they are to purpose, as well as the deeper level of
go. Think through bottom-line benefit to relationship (in
specific them. whatever way) be
advantages/opportunitie Listen, listen, listen: faithful to step into
s for each person. this next level.
Try to have the To objections: address ? Follow through with
recruitment style match them. Solve problems, next steps. Be willing
the relational don’t just take their to come back later to
connection: don’t use first “no” as the way pick up a check and
relationally it must be. Ask about their registration
inappropriate pressure what makes it hard to form. Drop off the
or make consider, etc. precourse assignment or
disproportionate To feelings: affirm and whatever is needed.
promises. understand, identify. Lower any logistical
We cannot recruit every Their insecurities, barrier that will help
student with the same uncertainties, fears. them follow through on
high energy and We may have dozens of their commitment to
investment. Think good reasons they come.
through the few folks should go, but if their ? Help them take future
we’ll stake a lot on, fears aren’t heard, it steps of discipleship.
the others we’ll will only backfire. Hopefully, this is just
recruit more casually, Help people think the beginning.
etc. clearly about what each ? Ask them how they are
Think through how a decision (including feeling about the
”no” in the ”yes”) will mean for risks, costs, parental
conversation can still them. and academic pressures,
be a step forward, not etc.
a step back, in the
relationship. Don’t
stake your entire
relationship on a
single decision.
The student should have
heard something about
the opportunity before
we try to have the
decisive conversation
with them:
announcement, other
conversations with
them. Avoid
high-pressure, “you
must decide now” sales
tactics.

. Recruiting as a team- individual decisions necessary but momentum as a

team to go. Recruiting for mission teams, new leadership teams, etc.
. Discipline- when a leader reneges on a commitment. Take this seriously, for the sake of the other leaders. Offer plenty of grace where people are softhearted (but perhaps stuck) but if people aren’t available, press them by offering to release them from their commitments. We only want people in leadership who not only keep their commitments (for example, go to chapter camp) but want to keep their commitments, because they understand why those commitments are necessary and advantageous.
. .The goal is to multiply recruiters, that students would become recruiters to almost everything we recruit students to.
. We should be thinking through how many folks at Chapter camp could be cared for by the leaders and partners we have? (3 to 1 ratio or so)
 
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Authored on: 10.16.2003
Uploaded by: Rich_Lamb
Uploaded on: 11.28.2005
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